You are yourself… right? | Guest post!

 

In Hell Exhale_CoverA story driven by greed, revenge and the boundaries that push friendships to there absolute limits. Jennifer finds herself in a world she never grew up in, on the run from a maniacal ruler hell bent on getting to her at all costs. But are things really what they seem, or is there someone behind the curtain pulling the strings, for plans that are much more vile and self indulgent at heart. Will Jennifer be strong enough to stand up for what she believes in when the world she thought she knew comes crumbling down around her and will you be strong enough to stand by her side…

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“You know looking back I don’t think I can remember the reason I started to write ‘In Hell Exhale’ or why I started writing in general for that matter.

Because I can. Is that a good enough reason. Is that ever a good enough reason to do anything?  Probably not. But I mean, I’ve always had a very vivid imagination which is often more of a double edged sword. It’s great when it comes to the writing side of things and the writer in me will forever be grateful. But not so much when you can see so much around you that you would like to change. That’s when I find having a vivid imagination more of a curse. Like the scarecrow says ‘if I only had a brain’…

…NO!! Ignorance is bliss you weird, creepy straw man. Just turn back before it’s too late!

(err… actually now I’ve said it I think I might be getting him confused with the tin man. Which one was creepy again… err…)

But anyway, even from a very young age and for as long as I can remember, I’ve always written, but it was always poems, short stories and things that were generally not even longer than a page. Even now, I’m struggling to come up with the right things to say even though this will probably be no longer than 5/600 words and I’m really having to scrape the bottom of my mind to find something that I think people will want to read. I even did a little bit of research online before I started, just so I could find out what other people in my shoes tend to write about, but one of the things I found, I found really strange…

PEOPLE WRITING ABOUT THEMSELVES IN THE THIRD PERSON!!

It’s not everyone (thank God!) But why do they do it?? it just baffles me. You wouldn’t talk that way or your friends and family would have you committed. So why write that way? Okay so maybe if I put it another way…

…you are yourself… right? So why do people seem to detach themselves from themselves when they’re writing about themselves…

(Wait. did that just make sense? Damn I think I need another drink)

Well crazy detour aside I think at the end of the day the only reason I started to write a novel in the first place was just to prove to myself that I could. Because so very few people actually do what they love for a living and probably even less do what they thought they would be doing as a kid. If your younger self could see you now they’d probably give you a hard slap across the face and be like…

‘HEY! what the f**k happened’

Okay so maybe not with that kind of language if it was actually the little kid in you, but you get my drift…

‘Oh darn’ maybe? Do kid’s say darn? Have they ever said that or have I just made that up? I’m not too sure anymore, but it’s still safe to say that they’d definitely be disappointed. Mine definitely would. Darn and all.

So if your reading this there’s a good chance that I’m not actually that much different to you. I work 45hours a week, in what feels like a 500-degree kitchen most of the time, just so I can make a living. It’s not glamourous and it’s definitely not pretty, but it’s what life has dealt me with. But writing is my passion and ‘In Hell Exhale’ is just the start of the story that I know I have running in my veins. This is something I’ve finally done for myself and whether I make money or not is irrelevant. It’s been a long time coming and just to release it is something that I never thought would ever be possible. This is my first step in finally doing something for me and not because the circumstances around me dictated it. And hopefully it won’t be my last.

Ben Porter

Writer of ‘In Hell Exhale’

 

 

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